“You cannot take photos at all, Michiel.”
In conversations with fellow photographers I quite often hear “You are doing well, Michiel”. Lovely to hear, because I am only muddling along too (after thinking about it for far too long, naturally). I usually say something along the lines of “stick your head above the parapet and it gets cut off”. It is an odd place to be, though I say so myself. My own fault, or my own doing.
Last year I gave a talk at the then new CameraNu shop in Rotterdam. A fine shop, with a large presentation space. At the back of the room an older, surly man. I thought I had seen him before. Within a few minutes of starting, the man began asking incoherent questions that were not even really about my subject (street photography). Awkward questions, strange remarks. When I asked him to come and talk further after the presentation, because I wanted to get on with my story, back came an oddly detached “I want an answer now”.
Lights started going on. I know this man. I know him from months of unpleasant, belittling emails. From that one phone call a year ago. I had blocked this man everywhere and now here he was, walking straight into the shop. I started shaking, uncomfortably. Keep going, they came for your story, not his. The room called him back into line. “Why not just go and sit on a café terrace somewhere.”
With momentum and genuine pleasure I finished my talk. Smiling faces, thank yous. “Inspiring, and can I buy your book?” Thank you all, and thank you for your patience during the unpleasant interruptions. A shame that one person can irritate a whole room like that.
You do not always have to agree with me. Preferably not. And online there are often responses: “Snobbish waffle, that podcast.” But when a keyboard warrior like that is suddenly standing in front of you, that is another matter.
It is all fine, really. I surround myself often and gladly with people who share the same passion. Photography is wonderful and it connects people. And everywhere there are people who want to grumble for the sake of grumbling. Who have no purpose left in life other than imposing themselves on others, online or off, to make up for too little attention in real life, I imagine. But you do end up thinking about it in spite of yourself. And then I always like to write it off my chest.
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